6/27/06


Even though I felt pretty good through 9:30 last night, it was down hill after that. Suddenly the nausea hit me hard, and dry heave and vomiting continued throughout the night and morning. The chemo-medicine Cisplatin requires consuming 3 quarts of water per day, because it damages one’s kidneys, and also J-tube requires water for digestion. But, I could not hold down any water.


The clinic told me to come in right away this morning, and gave me 1000ml of saline solution, and two different kind of anti-nausea medicine through the portacath.


Since I could not sleep last night, most of my day was spent in bed, dozing, watching Japanese drama, whose story always follows the expected script. The simplicity of the story is a blessing in my state right now, and anyway I like the actor in the drama.


After the visiting nurse stopped by at 6:00, I walked a little bit around the house. It was a breezy evening. The robin family that nested in the shrub in our front yard left a few days ago. I saw many tiny robins flying low while walking. Are they our robins? I am happy that I started seeing those birds as individual birds in the past few weeks.


As far as eating goes, I did not feel like eating at all today. I made miso soup, and had a few sips, and that’s all I had today. I hope that my nausea is controlled better with the new medicine, and that I can start eating more tomorrow.


When I was suffering from the nausea, I was trying to imagine Gandhi picking out the cancer cell, and removing it from his group. It was good to have at least an image during the worst hour.